MY TRIBUTE TO MY WONDERFUL SON, JULIEN THOMASSET
by Michelle Marques, 5 March 2016 (for french version, click here
|I feel honoured to be here with you today, the 5th March 2016, even if I have a strange feeling. I am happy to be here with you all, I feel your love, kindness, and support and at the same time I am so sad, I was not supposed to be here to celebrate the death of my young son, Jules. I am sure you can understand… how difficult it can be!
First of all I would like to thank everyone, one by one, thank you for your presence. A special thanks to Dila and her team who organized this event so perfectly in respect of the wishes of my family and myself and Jules of course.
THANK YOU to those who came to France as often as possible to manifest their love for HIM. THANK YOU for the ballad to the sea in the Junior car at the very beginning, THANK YOU for playing the guitar and singing with him, talking with HIM as he liked, for the shopping and the good food, for the laughs, lots of laughs and unfortunately for the tears we shared with HIM sometimes, for your accompaniment to the hospital, for the garden of Chaton, the parsley you planted, the trees you cut etc. etc. with so much kindness, love and Hope. “Pour les petits dejeuners au soleil, Camembert, baguette, cafe et the…”FOR THE MEDITATIONS. THANK YOU for the strength and the support you brought to HIM and to me.
In London, THANK YOU to those who came to HIM, hearts full of love and tenderness. Back in France he said to me “ Mum, it is not the perfect situation for me to be in London, at the moment, I know, but for me London is a place where I receive so much love and I need it.”
So for all these wonderful times you offered to HIM, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!
BRIAN & JANE came from the south of France, his headmaster and his Art teacher, 8 years together in Mougins School to build this man with so much love like a second father and a second mother. Thank you to be here today for his tribute. I love you two.
There are 3 men I would like to thank particularly, even though I don’t forget any one of you, your generosity, your commitment and your beauty.
The first man who took care of him is Vinny who helped him organizing his social security, when the illness showed the tip of its nose. He took him to the hospital and stayed near him all the time and came to him from the beginning to the end to bring his support and love. THANK YOU VINNY
The other man is RUPERT, an old friend of HIM, I was waiting for him in Cannes in the middle of the hurly-burly of this city and we were supposed to have a dinner for his birthday “40 years old”. But Jules called me; completely destroyed by the bad diagnosis “Lymphoma T4 aggressive” this delicious doctor announced that by phone, BRAVO!!! We were completely down, Rupert, upset, joined me and we went for a drink and I went back home quickly to talk to Jules on Skype. He was devastated!!
The other man is DAN; Jules wants to go to Hungary for the Gerson cure in January with Dan. Every day the life conditions of Jules are more and more difficult. In the middle of December, He needs my total presence day and night. After 3 days I realized I will not be able to do it alone, so I call my daughter Claire who comes immediately and Dan who comes from the countryside of Berlin, I don’t know how! The day after. We are able to share it together and we did so with others who joined us quickly (family and friends).
Sometimes and particularly at this moment it is difficult to put all the words I have in my heart to express my complete feelings for every one of you, sorry about that! But I remember everyone and every gesture.
|Now, I would like to talk about these last years, even if it was not my intention at the beginning, because it’s heart-breaking, un Crevecoeur, I have to do it.
The 14 November 2013, just before the bad news came out, waiting for Rupert, I bought a Moleskin book for Jules, our favourite sketchbook. This book will be his soul mate on this long journey. It begins like that, “L’aventure commence”, Drawing, writing, treatment information …
When he feels better, we decide to go to see Claire in Orange; we stop on the motorway, an ordinary parking. There are trees not far away and hundreds of white butterflies flying, it’s amazing! One, only one flies to him and touches him. Why? What does this mean??? Good or bad news? It was my inner question, at this moment.
After all this poison in his body, his blood is completely destroyed and he needs an injection of Granocytes. He does the best he can to take care of his body, walks to the sea, eats good food [fruits, vegetables] and supplements and homeopathy and meditations and he draws non-stop “in the whole seeing fabric of the universe” his own words.
He waits for your visits intensively; it’s like a breath of fresh air in the middle of this mess.
“GOOD COMPANY – Ever so grateful to have had such a collection of incredible souls to spend time with, sometimes travelling afar spending quality time away from the illness, keeping the mind happy and playful allowing it to expand rather than dwell…”
But one other trial awaits him, the Autogreffe, a new strong chemo and the injection of his own stem cells into the blood, more than 3 weeks in a sterile room with a tube of 7 meters, a sort of prison… Imagine! Loneliness, inappropriate food and at the end lots of pain, this is the deal. Personally I am not convinced of the efficiency of this treatment. But I respect his choice and follow him. The doctors are surprised by his work, a wonderful triptych, and by his kindness as always.
The Petscan is perfect, Julien is cured and we can celebrate, full of joy we have won!!! Wouahoo!!! Very quickly he runs to London to celebrate with his lovely friends, full of love and hope.
The 14th August, 2014 he writes this page for you in his book in French:
“Full of joy and expectation, I thank again the Life which gives to me the chance to see again in good health my London family.
Unfortunately, Jules has won a battle but not the war, because the GENIUS OF THE ILLNESS as it’s called in medical jargon comes back quickly ruthless, strong, like an octopus growing in his body. The Petscan is worse than ever. The BEAST is back…
[The allogreffe uses the stem cells of one of his sisters – of course they are ready to do it and it entails 7 weeks minimum in a sterile room and after that it is not finished for months]
For the second time the Petscan is good. Anyway there are not a lot of medical solutions or maybe severe therapy, later. Now we know the BEAST AND ALL ITS HORRIBLE QUALITIES is here, crouched in a corner, we know that Him and me, but without a word, just respect between us, LOVE &
As you know
But the blood is not good and we have to make a transfusion. He cries that he doesn’t want to go to the hospital, I reassure him it’s the last time! I promise and so it is. He is not strong enough to stand up. We go to the Pyrenees to see his friend GUILLAUME and their family, particularly his goddaughter, a sweet moment…globally.
Back in Antibes a Petscan is programmed, at this moment he is unable to walk or to stand up and the result is bad, bad, bad. There are metastases everywhere – in the brain , in the spine, in the lung, in the bones. Dr Garnier says there is nothing to do, except algotherapy…
I have lived difficult moments in my life but this will be forever the most terrible event of my life.
The day before, to distract him, we talk about our journey that we dream of, the Baleares, Turkey, sun and sea, etc.
I think you have enough information on the last steps of the story, because of the page on Facebook ‘We Love Jules”.
You are maybe wondering why does Michelle talk for so long about this difficult time of Jules’s story, because Jules asks me to do it; it’s a gift for you.
“Our generation is the one that can change this world, some of us and we are in it and we can do it because we are artists, musicians, drawers, painters, directors, etc. etc. We are the builders of new thoughts in this world and as artists we are powerful.
But as you know CHANGE is the most difficult issue for human beings, but we are built to do it. So follow your light, your unique talents, your inner gifts, stay strong and focused and it will happen.
TAKE CARE OF YOUR LIFE, OF YOURSELF, OF YOUR CHILDREN, OF EVERYTHING essential AROUND YOU.
|This is only 2 or 3 years in the life of Jules, a terrible moment but a time of accomplishment on many planes.
Who is he? What we must keep in mind is the essential, his fingerprint in this life, his soul and his core.
First of all, with simplicity he goes towards all others without fear. They can be rich or poor, old or young, male or female, beautiful or ugly, no problem for him. He opens his arms and his heart all the time. He knows how to welcome others.
It’s his sovereignty “ALLER A LA RENCONTRE” a beautiful quality of a noble man.
Move, a second quality of Jules, he has an urgent need to create, to move, everyone knows that. He has a way to find beauty, harmony, even in this world. It’s in him, look at him moving… Look at his approach so large and so precise to ART.
But Jules is so indulgent, receptive, welcoming, compassionate that he can find himself without self-defence, completely overwhelmed. He can be conscious of this situation and reacts and works on himself to balance yin and yang. As you know he is clever and sees perfectly in the others all the aspects with forgiveness. What is the best solution for him at this moment?
The end of his life allows his accomplishment, in all his light. He knows how to welcome others, how to go to his mountain, how to create, how to nourish his core, his soul.
DANS SON DERNIER SOUPIR, IL A REALISE L’UNITE EN SOI
|Before the end of my tribute to Jules my last prayer the 14th January 2016
HOPI INDIANS PRAYER
“To those I love … and those who love me”
When I am gone, release me, let me go,
Thank you for the love that everyone showed me,
For a short time you can have it.
Let the memories soothe your pain
Absent from my body, present with God
|THE RECOGNITION OF JULES
I’ve come to the end, as you can imagine I will never be able to forget the 38 years I shared with this wonderful man, this son, the life entrusted to me. I will remember so many memories, images, sounds, songs, writings, paintings, his beautiful smile, his sweetness etc. I feel very honoured to be Julien’s mother; I thank him for coming into our life.
A LAST THING
Around 3 days after Jules passed away, I saw him in white clothes surrounded by light, a big smile on his lips and I feel he is so happy. One second later I see a big mushroom, enormous, made of vibrations and lot of little lights, sort of Prana, I have seen in Quebec.
In fact I have not finished, I have to introduced my little one, my granson LOULOU, LOUIS, POCKYPOCKET, the nephew of Jules, the son of Claire and Christian present to day, Louis is the inheritor of my son. Jules is more for him; he is his big brother because they grow up together in the same house, maybe his mentor.
My long speech was supposed to be finished but my Angel is here!!!